A Journey with the Lord

By Little Sister Gonez GonezGonez
Little sister Gones is from Sri Lanka. She has lived in the Philippines for many years, and is now serving as the continental coordinator for our communities in Asia. She writes about her relationship with God and how it changes her life.
"Look, I am standing at the door, knocking. If anyone hears me calling and opens the door, I will come in to share a meal at that person's side." (Rev 3,20)
The initiative in the relationship comes from God, who is calling. I open my heart to this loving invitation. As in any relationship, I need to spend time with the one I love. I need to hear their gentle whisper, and let go of my preconceived notions and ideas of God. Then I open myself in simplicity and honesty, to become aware of God's actions in the events and situations of my life, in neighbours, co-workers, friends, and in the world. They all speak to me. The Joy is to experience the personal love of God-so great and yet so humble, making himself available in Jesus. I desire to belong to him fully. In this relationship I am slowly able to discover my true identity. It allows me to see beyond the surface reality of myself, of situations and other persons. In this light I am able, little by little, to see my inner resistance and blockages which hinder me from following the Lord with greater freedom. This relationship with the Lord is strengthened by praying with the Holy Scriptures, and by the daily Eucharist, the centre and summit of our life (even though at times it can become routine, lack proper preparation, or feel quite lifeless.) In our community we have times of regular faith-sharing and reviewing our life in the light of God's word. It is mutually enriching and has the potential to heal wounds and rebuild us. Silent adoration is also vital. There, as a "delegate to prayer," I come before the Lord bringing the whole world's aspirations, longings, joys and sufferings. I love this simple daily gesture. Even though many times I am dry, empty and do not feel his presence, I trust he is there. As I grow older, I sense a deeper need simply to be with him, to adore him. Times of recollection and retreats are valuable opportunities to pause and go deeper. I can look back on my journey with the Lord and renew my love and commitment. Setting aside these times fuels the quality of my relationship with my brothers and sisters in daily life. Many times, it is they who teach me how to be faithful through the testimony of their life, with their simple faith, facing life's burdens with courage. Thanks to our foundress, Little Sister Magdeleine, we can live this beautiful relationship of presence in ordinary life, being little sisters of Jesus to everyone. The challenges and difficulties are many: my inner "droughts," the fragility of our communities, wars, the suffering of the innocent. I try not to give in to fear and pessimism. I try not to rush around in the face of emergencies, imagining how I could be more "productive." For then, in my daily busy-ness, I could fail to perceive God, fail to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus. I need to cultivate an attitude of inner silence so I am able to hear God's word being spoken to me through the different circumstances of my daily Nazareth. I need to believe, like Zechariah and Elizabeth, who were called to bear a child in their old age; like Mary who did not know man but who by her “fiat” brought forth the Saviour of the world.
Prayer and faith mean opening the door to the Lord, letting him enter, and enjoying a meal with him; letting him work in my 'soil' so it can bear fruit in the time and place of his desire...